The types of things we are willing to spend more money on will vary for each of us (e.g. think gadgets, clothes, car, or entertainment), and this is based on more than just the retail value of the product or service.

For the next 30 seconds, think about the main things you spend the most money on and write a short list. You should be able to come up with 3-5 things pretty easily. Include things that you may not purchase very frequently, but that you spend a fair bit on when you do.

I really encourage you to record them in some way – because there’s a lot this list can tell you!

Dr John Demartini talks about the correlation between what we spend our money on, and what our values are.

For example, I spend quite a bit on cat food/health/wellbeing – which suggests (correctly) that I value my kitties very highly. If you spend a large portion of your income on your accommodation, then that might suggest that anything from security, to location or personal space are top priorities for you. And if holidays are a big annual spend, then that will indicate another of your top values – depending on what a holiday means most to you  (it could be about escape, relaxation, adventure, exploration etc).

So you can start to see some of the insights about what is important to you, and also use it to sanity-check a purchase… “Will this xyz honour the value that I’m buying it for?”

I was also struck by a particular appeal while watching the TEDx video that Gina shared with us a few weeks ago; Adam Baker encouraged us to:

“Start collecting experiences, not things.”

And as I was pondering this today, I realised it provided another clue based on what we spend our money on.

My list looks something like this (in no particular order):

• Cats
• Travel (to Australia, for courses/business)
• Dining out
• Books

And if I add one or two things that seem slightly disproportionate to the rest of my spending, then Starbucks and fine wine probably deserve a place too.

I was quite surprised to find that all of these were actually more about the experiences they give me, than the actual purchases themselves. Travel grants me access to my family, friends and development opportunities. Books give me experiences of escape and learning. Dining out and fine wine give me experiences that anchor me in the moment – I love savouring a mouthful of culinary magic, or the complexity of an aged red (not to mention the usually fine company!). And I confess, Starbucks gives me a whole host of experiences – comfort, belonging, social interaction, a creative environment.

So whilst I do still spend money on other “stuff” – a greater amount of my spending is done on things that I deem to give me valuable experiences.

And it can get even more interesting when we discover that our spending habits highlight values we may not have recognised as top priorities in our lives! Our values heavily influence our decisions – whether we are aware of them or not!

I was pretty surprised to consider the amount I spent on health & wellbeing last year… I certainly valued recovery from injury (mobility, independence, relief from pain) pretty highly!

We can also look at things we dislike or resent spending money on, for clues as to what might fall nearer the bottom of our values list. Whilst there might be some usual suspects, are there any that surprise you?

Perhaps next time you take out your cash or plastic – you might take a moment to think about which value the purchase is affirming for you.

Is it giving you a valuable experience, or is it just more stuff?

The High Street in Halifax at 7pm

This was the question posed to me recently on Twitter. You see, I’ve been spending a LOT of time in Halifax recently. It’s a relatively small town in West Yorkshire, in the north of England. It’s situated in a valley with three main roads in and out of the town. Most of the roads are one-way and traffic can be snarled up for quite some time during rush hour. There are a couple of very large companies based there which means a lot of people commute. This, in my humble opinion, is the root of the problem.

Most people can’t wait to get out, beat the traffic and get home in time for “tea”. This leaves Halifax like a ghost town in the evenings. Most places are closed either on a Monday or Tuesday, or even worse have shut down completely. Walking down the deserted high street in the evenings all I see are pound shops, charity shops, discount bakers, pawn brokers and banks.

So after several visits I must admit I was commenting on the sorry state of the town quite a bit on Twitter. So much so that someone, quite rightly, challenged me with a question that felt like a slap around the face with a cold wet kipper. (No, I have no idea where that analogy came from either).

“There must be something good about Halifax?!”

I very quickly realised that I had fallen into the trap of wallowing. I seemed to be getting some twisted satisfaction providing details of how depressing the town was and how I couldn’t wait to get home to London.

After a few moments, I began to realise that there was something I loved about the place. The people I’m working with are the cream of their area. They are hard working, yet fun and friendly. They take time to help you when you are in need. They are a really great bunch of people to be working with.

So from now on whenever I think about returning to Halifax, I think about my work colleagues, and realise that I’m actually looking forward to seeing them. Sometimes you have to take the good with the bad, but just don’t let the bad bits blur your vision.

So my challenge to you is simple. Think about your current situation and anything that you feel is negative, or that you have a very low opinion of, and ask yourself….

There must be something good about this?

Then let me know what it is!

Spending is an activity that some of us love, and some of us dislike – yet we do it in some form or another every single day, whether we are conscious of it or not. It is usually associated with the notions of consuming, disposing of and exhausting (the object or resource) – and there is often a sense of trade – ‘this’ for ‘that’, to meet an immediate need or want. So, if we are not talking about money – then what other resource do we spend daily?

How do you spend your time?

Having an awareness of where and how you spend your time can be more revealing than you may initially think. What proportion of your regular 24 hour day is consumed by sleeping, eating, email, working, travelling, chores etc? How do these proportions vary for the days of your weekend?

Saving is often something we wish we did more of, yet here is the sticking point – time flows continuously and there is no bank account that we can save it in each day… or is there? We can arguably ‘save’ time by doing things more effectively and being more efficient; but you can’t necessarily say “I’m not going to spend this two hours today, I want to add it to my available hours tomorrow”. Many a lament has been made with the wish to turn back time.

In what ways do you currently save time?

On the rare occasions when we do manage to save some time through efficiency or luck, it quickly seems to get siphoned away by other things on our To-Do lists, or even just ‘disappears into thin air’! It would be easy to assume that spending time is somehow the ‘wrong’ thing to do; yet this assumption could lead straight to a trap – spending time worrying about how or how to avoid spending our time. Some amount of spending our time each day may be unavoidable, the difference is the conscious choice; so let’s change the question:

How could you enjoy or respect your choice of what you spend time on today?

Investing can be simply another way of spending resources, however the generally accepted meaning of this term is to commit a resource in order to gain a return (where there is the potential for profitable returns, financial or otherwise). Is a job is spending or investing time? Even in an ambitious career path whilst you can work harder, win promotions and pay-rises, and build a team of people around you – the job value or return is still directly proportional to the time you put into it. With the exception of limited sick leave and holiday pay, if you don’t work in your job swapping hours for income, then you don’t get paid. You may have built up a wealth of experience and skill-base, yet those things will only primarily enable you to get another job.

How much of your time do you currently invest?

If we consider the example of investing money, how likely would you be to invest 10% of your income in something without adequate information and understanding of the benefit (profit or return) you would receive? What if you were considering investing 25% of your income? Or 50%? The idea of committing almost any sum of money without exploring the benefits (and risks) is not something many of us would even entertain; yet we do it every day with our time.

10% of your daily time is 2 hours and 24 minutes! Unlike money – which can be replaced – once time is gone, there is no getting it back. How does that shift how you think about your day?

To really shine a spotlight on this… would you agree that with every second of every day each of us is moving closer to the moment where our time here has run out? Regardless of age, beliefs or circumstances – there comes a point when our ‘time is up’. This does not necessarily imply that our time is scarce. Whilst immortality may (physically) elude us, we have a fundamental choice over how we spend or invest our time each and every day. So whilst we may not have forever, we certainly have this second, this minute, this hour and this day; and our decisions made for previous spending habits do not need to constrain our decisions right now. All change starts from a place of awareness.

When did you last invest in yourself?

How would your life be different if you made one choice to invest an hour of your day instead of spending it? That is less than 5% of your time today. The exciting part starts with deciding how to invest it in the best way for you!

(© Seraphima Coaching 2007-2008, www.seraphima.com, L3 Messages Extract: August’07)