It’s all too easy to make snap judgements with friends and loved ones. If someone upsets us, we often go into immediate reaction with statements like: “You always…” or “You never…”.
Not the best way to engage and make positive emotional connections! It simply makes the other person shut down. Sam and Gina discuss the J-word vis-a-vis their own relationships. And offer 3 helpful tips on how we can check in on our own behaviour – and make powerful adjustments – before we start projecting and blaming others.
As regular readers will know, I am a big fan of the writer, playwright and all-round creative maestro, Julia Cameron. In her seminal work, The Artist’s Way, she takes readers through an inspiring 12-week programme to identify creative blocks and U-turns, re-ignite the creative spark within, and then take action to keep the flame alive.
I was lucky enough to attend a workshop of Julia’s here in London recently. Her amazing way of engaging the subconscious and allowing it full expression, despite the ego’s resistance was a wonderful exercise in giving my creativity full reign. I remembered long forgotten dreams of photography, art and dance. Working in pairs we blasted through self-doubt and internal critics to discover what we would truly love to create. And the best thing? It doesn’t have to be perfect. Read more of this article »
Are you looking for new direction and new inspiration this year? Instead of asking others for advice, how about asking yourself these 10 power questions. They’ll give you insights and guidance towards creating the life that you really want.
1. If tomorrow was your last day on Earth, what would you wish you’d done in your life (but haven’t).
2. Do you have a recurring vision or dream about a particular place, job, activity, people?
3. What do you feel you were put on this Earth to do?
4. What do you care deeply about?
5. Name 5 things you are really good at.
6. Ask 5 people what they think you’re good at.
7. If you had a week all to yourself without any responsibilities, what would you do?
8. What’s the most important decision you are facing right now? What stops you from making it?
9. If I told you that you had unlimited time and resources and that you could do anything you want in life, what would that be?
10. What are the first steps you can take towards doing the work or leading the life you’d love?
Inside your heart is a dream that may yet be unfulfilled. By focusing on what you love, rather than what you feel you should be doing will give you greater energy and insight. One easy way to start is to write non-stop for about 20 minutes, listing all the things you love doing. I did this recently and it was very revealing! Begin using your imagination to create, rather than clinging to a belief system that holds you back. Every single thing you see in the world today was created initially by someone’s imagination. As Lennon himself said: “Imagine…”
Are you a perfectionist? Do you spend hours labouring over presentations that should only take you 30 minutes? Do you often feel you can’t write that book, have that relationship or find the job you love until you are somehow better than you are? The limiting belief inside most perfectionists is a lack of self-belief and low self-esteem. A limiting belief that you are simply not good enough. Chris and Gina discuss the warning signs and what you can do to be successful – even when you’re not perfect.
The first week of January is a very potent, magical time. It’s a great opportunity to sit back and reflect on the past year: your successes and achievements, and also a look at things that didn’t work out quite as you’d planned.
Many of us have New Year’s resolutions we’d like to put into action, but all too often by the third week of January, they are forgotten dreams. Put into mothballs for December 31st next year. Read more of this article »
It’s a great phrase, ‘comfort zone’. It sounds so familiar, so safe, so secure. A sure haven where we can rest a while – for centuries even – and never leave. So instead of taking risks, stepping out and seeing what we really are capable of in life, we tend to expand our comfort zones. Ever increasing circles. Ever decreasing opportunities. Clever, or so our mind thinks, but not a very practical nor far sighted life strategy. Believe me, there are times when I’ve stayed in mine for years. And serve me it has not.
So how can we mitigate the reptilian fears that come up every time a new opportunity in life arises, or new challenges, whether they be work, relationships, moving home, moving country? Read more of this article »
Breakthrough with Tony Robbins is a new series being shown in the USA on NBC. It inspired Chris and Paul to talk about what a breakthrough is and how even the most simple changes can result in a dramatic change. This change may not be apparent immediately but with time and some reflection you too could find your very own breakthroughs have already happened and could be happening right now.
The show on NBC isn’t available to people outside of the USA, so you can view the first episode directly from breakthroughwithtonyrobbins.com
Yes, it’s that familiar twinge of guilt… the nagging feeling in the pit of your stomach, the one subject that’s going to make you procrastinate for sure. The almighty ‘Should’.
Apparently, psychologist Clayton Barbeau gave the world the oft-used ‘shoulding all over yourself’, taken to a more below-the belt conclusion by another couch potato – clearly a big Freud fan – who dubbed it ‘musterbation’.
But whatever moniker you give this feeling, if you’re anything like me, once the dread word ‘should’ enters your brain you have a sudden indescribable urge to do exactly the opposite. Or put it off for weeks, nay months, even years for the more stubborn ‘delayers’ among us.
Being a coach, I’m very keen to “walk the talk” or rather, not just say coaching is good but have a coach myself because I know just how powerful it can be.
During a recent session it quickly became clear that I was on the verge of taking on too much. Over the last few months the power of being coached has resulted in some significant changes in my life and how I view situations. I’d been actively putting in a lot of work, spinning a lot of plates and generally been about as busy as I could physically be.
What surprised me was that I’ve now reached a point where pretty much everything is going to plan, on track and on schedule. I found myself looking for that extra thing that would put me back into the sensation of feeling, well rushed, busy and on the edge of coping.
I had become so used to “working my butt off” that now I had been able to schedule things better, automate them or even outsource them (my new favourite thing!) I was presented with a strange feeling of “what next?”!
Thankfully working with my coach I was able to see that, I was busy, very busy in fact. I was however, working smarter, better than before and I was now producing the results without having to work 16 hours a day. Ultimately I want to keep it this way, working at a pace that is healthy and even FUN! As long as I’m still progressing, make moves in the direction that I want to go at a pace that works, then I’m doing the right thing.
I’d love to hear from others that have almost become so used to feeling rushed, that they often end up missing that feeling when everything is going to plan. What do you do to make sure you don’t overload yourself, just because you feel you should. How do you know when enough is enough?
C.H.A.N.G.E. The final frontier… The big C-word is an inevitable part of life, but something most of us resist on a daily basis. We like to think we’re flexible, that we can always ‘go with the flow’. But instead, many of us simply tie ourselves even tighter to our mast of familiarity.
Find something you’re scared of, and 9 times out of 10 it involves some kind of change in your life: new job, new relationship, new hair colour, new house, new school, new teacher, new country, new car! The list is endless.
So why do we resist? And how can we overcome the fear of change? Or rather, do we really have to?
Creating rapport
Other people are our greatest resource. Most everything you’ll ever want in life, you’ll need someone else to help you get it. From dry-cleaning to a promotion. From the fine art of sexual conjoinment, to that convertible you’ve been coveting. It takes (more than) two to tango. You can’t do it all alone. The benefits of creating and maintaining rapport with other human beings are enormous, so unless you’re a natural, it’s an essential skill worth learning. Read more of this article »
Are you finding it increasingly difficult to communicate with your children? Do you spend more time trying to control and discipline than talking with and listening to them? If you are feeling disempowered as a parent, then this podcast may well be the answer to your prayers! Gina talks to family coach pioneer, Alan Wilson, founder of Develop Your Child, about effective ways to engage with and listen to your children, leading to a deeper emotional connection and a more fulfilling and supportive family dynamic.
For further information on family coaching and resources available visit Alan’s website at: www.developyourchild.co.uk
I was up early this morning at 6am. I say early but this is now my normal time to get up during the week. I decided a while back and have mentioned on some of our podcasts, to make time for the gym, I decided to get up and hour earlier.
I have done this before and wanted to start doing it again. This morning however, I was really struggling to get dressed, ready and out the door. I was really close to saying to myself that it was OK and that I could go later. That’s when it hit me…. Read more of this article »
WHEN life gets challenging, do you find yourself ruminating regretfully on the past – searching for reasons to justify present dissatisfactions? The anxiety producing “If only… you’d taken that job, married that person, moved countries, bought that flat, had different parents, gone to a different college, taken less drugs, taken more drugs, had more fun, travelled more, had children, not had children… Read more of this article »
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