Comments for Action Podcast

Comment on Make A Wish List by Regina

Regina — Wed, 01 Sep 2010 13:55:31 +0000

Gina, Thanks for the great reminder to wish! I don’t really remember creating a list as a kid – maybe. After hearing about your list, I wish I did. As an adult, from time to time I have created goals that were both personal and professional. When I have done it, most of my goals have happened. I am now inspired to write my wishes down and reflect often on them. Thank you for your inspiring message.

Comment on The Big Impact of Little Baby Steps by Claire

Claire — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 13:28:01 +0000

yes, small steps can conquer addiction, survive mental illness, pass an exam, raise a child, make u get out bed each day…

Lovely!

Comment on Resolutions – Why Bother?! by Claire

Claire — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 13:24:03 +0000

This is seriously excellent advice. Too many people pick on themselves for things they should have done, or said they would do. To force yourself to look back objectively and ask “what did I do?” provides a wonderful opportunity to realise what you have actually done.

It can be life affirming and is especailly important for people like myself who suffer from depression and often only judge ourselves negatively. Be proud of what you have done, not guilty for what you didn’t do, and if necessary try to do better next time.

Comment on 6 Unusual Tips for Coping with Pre-Exam Stress by Sam

Sam — Sun, 29 Aug 2010 20:46:43 +0000

Thanks for sharing Claire!
I totally agree, and am also really happy for you (and proud of you too!).
Many people never learn the power of small steps, and I’ve only begun to appreciate how magic they are – so I’d say you’re well ahead of the game.

Comment on Using Social Networking Groups by 6 Tips for Fun, Successful Networking | Design Your Life - Professional Coaching

Sun, 22 Aug 2010 13:34:22 +0000

[...] you’d like more tips on successful networking, listen to our Actionpodcast show on the [...]

Comment on 6 Unusual Tips for Coping with Pre-Exam Stress by Claire

Claire — Thu, 19 Aug 2010 23:34:17 +0000

Small steps each day! The only way to live life really. This advice helped me conquer mental illness, complete an 8 year degree (I did it part time)and find a safe emotional place. It’s also great advice for exam studying

Comment on The Big Impact of Little Baby Steps by Jan Delmas

Jan Delmas — Mon, 16 Aug 2010 22:35:09 +0000

Hi Chris

Very true about manageable chunks, particularly when it is a major task. Thanks for your thoughts and the podcast. I love it and have been following all of you for a while.

Jan

Comment on The Big Impact of Little Baby Steps by Chris

Chris — Mon, 16 Aug 2010 16:22:58 +0000

Hi Jan,

You’re absolutely right. I like your two list approach to avoid the “worrying about forgetting” (kind of a funny but true statement!). The other problem people give themselves with to-do lists is they don’t make the items clear enough. A to-do of ‘write presentation’ sounds straightforward enough, but overlooks all the research, conversations, drafts and reviews needed to complete the presentation. So people end up stressed that the item took up the whole day and they didn’t get everything else done. If you break it down to the smallest manageable chunks, you’ll always know exactly where to begin, and begin with confidence, plus have a better idea of how much time the to-dos will really take.

Chris

Comment on The Big Impact of Little Baby Steps by Jan Delmas

Jan Delmas — Mon, 16 Aug 2010 02:52:55 +0000

This reminds me of a chat I was having with my sister yesterday. She mentioned that a colleague said that ‘to do’ lists should not be used. My sister is a big ‘to do’ lister and was quite disturbed by this. My comment was that you should have at least two ‘to do’ lists, one for the current day which lists all the things you want and know you can do. The other(s) is your catch-all from which you can take your daily ‘to dos’. The big list also stops you from worrying about forgetting what you need to do.

On reading your great post I should have said it was about baby steps. People see a long list and become overwhelmed. A short do-able list takes away that overwhelm and motivates you to keep moving forward.

And the next thing you know you are doing and achieving more.

Comment on Information Overload by The big impact of little baby steps » Action Podcast

The big impact of little baby steps » Action Podcast — Wed, 11 Aug 2010 09:01:55 +0000

[...] is so easy to get overwhelmed with all the choices and distractions that surround us continuously. Information overload is a new problem of the 21st century. The subsequent setback is that overwhelm usually leads to [...]

Comment on The Danger of Comparisons by Paul

Paul — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 10:00:42 +0000

Hey Emily! Thanks you so much for the kind comment, I’m so glad you felt a connection with it and had a light bulb moment ! It really made me giggle when you said that.

Let Gina and I know how you get on with this new way of comparing

Cheers!
Paul

Comment on The Danger of Comparisons by Emily Rowley

Emily Rowley — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 09:48:35 +0000

Thanks so much for this podcast! Lightbulb moment – the only really fair comparison is to your ‘old’ self. Brilliant! Focus on satisfaction from self improvement instead of comparison with unattainable ideals. Must go and write this down.

Comment on 3 Great ways to take care of yourself when looking for work by Tara

Tara — Mon, 19 Jul 2010 15:05:37 +0000

Really great chat guys, thanks! I’m not working currently and completely relate to what you say about feeling guilty about not spending every minute job hunting! But I recently started taking breaks like you’re suggesting and I’m amazed at how helpful they are! I let my imagination have some fun and see myself in the ideal role for me! I come back to my ‘work’ re-energized, with better focus and ultimately have been more productive!

Comment on Do You Need To Be Right (all the time?) by Gina

Gina — Sun, 11 Jul 2010 10:18:14 +0000

Thank you Regina! Giving up the need to be right means we can be more fully present with people. It allows us to be ourselves without fear of judgment (always a biggie). Appreciate your positive feedback! – Gina

Comment on Do You Need To Be Right (all the time?) by Regina Ryan

Regina Ryan — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 14:19:58 +0000

Gina: How true! This article speaks to the heart of being open minded! As leaders or in our personal lives, this communication approach opens up more possibilities. Great reminder and insight Gina. Thank you for this article and your perspective! – Regina

Comment on Use hindsight as foresight – and live life on your terms by Chris

Chris — Wed, 09 Jun 2010 20:22:44 +0000

Sure don’t Stephanie! That’s a key point. For me it’s just a review of my to-do lists and outcomes I wanted, and if I didn’t get it all done, I figure out why not and make adjustments next time. Most people fall into the trap of getting more stressed out because they only got 3 of 10 things done and decide they need to work harder or longer to get it all done. That’s the exact reason we need to stop and reflect without judgement, but rather with curiousity and inquisitiveness! Ohhh…other BIG thing I’ve learned is it can feel like a pain to spend an hour each week looking back and planning ahead, but that hour always…ALWAYS!…makes me more productive and gives me about 5 more hours to spend time on what and with whom I really want to

Comment on Use hindsight as foresight – and live life on your terms by Stephanie Butcher

Stephanie Butcher — Wed, 09 Jun 2010 15:15:24 +0000

This is great advice Chris and as you say you don’t have to spend hours soul searching!!

Comment on Procrastination is the thief of time by Positive transformation by taking ACTION » Action Podcast

Positive transformation by taking ACTION » Action Podcast — Wed, 09 Jun 2010 09:06:07 +0000

[...] to everything you want to achieve. Even if you’ve struggled for a while or know you’ve procrastinated on making a change – that’s life, you’re human just like me. So if your initial reaction [...]

Comment on Procrastination is the thief of time by Gina

Gina — Tue, 08 Jun 2010 09:25:05 +0000

Hi Joe

Happy to hear you found the article useful! It’s so easy to put things off so I’m happy to hear you are going to put the points into action and get cracking!

Lovely to get such positive feedback, thank you.

Best wishes,

Gina

Comment on Procrastination is the thief of time by joe

joe — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 12:38:38 +0000

ironicly i cam across this page while putting off work heh…however this peice is fantastic and i find the case of procrastination interesting and is a case of simply ‘getting up off your arse’..
before becoming a student i worked as a restaurant manager and found it hard even find a moment to procrastinate …but now being a student it seems easily found…using your points i’m going to put it in to action and get the most from life!

bring on the future

regards joe

Comment on 4 Questions Towards Your Best ‘You’ by Paul

Paul — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 08:04:02 +0000

Thanks Stephie, it was a little outside of my comfort zone for sure, so I’m really glad you took the time to comment. I didn’t want it to just be a session where we give each other glowing references! It was more about the exercise itself and how to put it into practise. I certainly can relate to your fears of actually asking other people to answer the questions for you. It might be easier if you start with just writing the answers for them first, that way you already have a trick up your sleeve

Thanks for your well wishes too! For those that don’t know, over the last weekend I was rushed to hospital as I was passing a kidney stone, OUCH! I’m much more comfortable now, although as I type this I have a hot water bottle on my back I’m definitely over the worst of it though, just have to rest and recover. Phew!

Comment on 4 Questions Towards Your Best ‘You’ by Stephanie Butcher

Stephanie Butcher — Tue, 01 Jun 2010 17:21:54 +0000

I LOVED this podcast. Not sure if I’m quite brave enough to ask anyone the 4 questions just yet but I’ve written them down anyway. I’ve been thinking more about how I’d answer them for the 10 most important people in my life.

I’m sure you won’t be surprised to know that your personalities come over exactly as you both describe each other. It’ lovely to know that you are so genuine and I found it very moving to listen to you both.

Hope you’re well on the way to recovery Paul after your bank holiday illness.

Comment on I’m Late! by Sam

Sam — Wed, 26 May 2010 11:38:44 +0000

Oh dear! You guys have been describing me too! My watch is set 15mins fast, yet I’m perpetually late (or only just arriving ‘on time’), but this is still an improvement over what I used to be like!
I think for me it is a combination of not accurately estimating the time it takes to get moving once I shift gears for the next thing, and also getting distracted.
Recently, I was reliant on public transport and had to make sure I got up early to catch a particular train. I ended up finding myself feeling more stressed though, because I was worried that I’d be late even though I’d gotten up earlier. I almost decided I’d rather be late instead!
I’d be interested to hear other listeners’ thoughts on their experiences, and what also works well for them (if they used to be late or use the watch-cheat).

Comment on Time to spring clean your mind by Positive transformation by taking ACTION » Action Podcast

Positive transformation by taking ACTION » Action Podcast — Wed, 19 May 2010 15:45:54 +0000

[...] Chris’ recent blog post struck a chord with me, as a reminder that ‘Spring has sprung’ and that it is the season we associate with fresh air, new beginnings, and time for change. So whilst the Scottish weather may not be quite in agreement on this yet, there is certainly a fitting sense of rebirth within British politics right now. [...]

Comment on Ways to Overcome Learned Helplessness by Paul

Paul — Wed, 12 May 2010 08:23:46 +0000

Hi Sunshine,
Gina is travelling at the moment otherwise she would have replied personally. I told her about your comment and she was delighted to hear your enthusiasm. I’ll add some automatic links to the books you have recommend as we always love to hear from people on what helped them. I hope to hear from you again in the near future with an update on your own progress. All the best. Paul

Comment on Ways to Overcome Learned Helplessness by Sunshine Evert

Sunshine Evert — Sat, 08 May 2010 20:05:30 +0000

Gina, thank you for communicating such an important message on a very critical human topic. It is vitally important as a human community that we talk about learned helplessness so that individuals can identify it, better understand it, have an awareness about it, and know that there is a way out of it. By you writing about it and sharing this article on this website, you have made a difference in someone’s life. Thank you for the work that you and your colleagues are doing. Keep it up! I would like to offer some book recommendations that have been useful to me a long my own journey:
Drama of the Gifted Child by Alice Miller, The Dance of Wounded Souls by Robert Burney, Boundaries: Where You End and I Begin by Anne Katherine, and The Dance of Fear by Harriet Lerner.

Comment on A Fix For A Fixer by Paul

Paul — Wed, 28 Apr 2010 20:48:06 +0000

It was our pleasure Rob!

Comment on A Fix For A Fixer by Rob

Rob — Mon, 26 Apr 2010 01:10:25 +0000

Thanks again. Great Podcast!

Comment on Information Overload by Paul

Paul — Fri, 23 Apr 2010 07:01:23 +0000

Hi Stephie.

It great to see that the initial work you did to de-clutter your life has raised your awareness enough to help you spot when you start to drift back to your old ways.

What was it that triggered this temporary return? Have a look at that and see what you can do to ensure it doesn’t catch you out again.

Keep up the great work!

Comment on Information Overload by Stephanie Butcher

Stephanie Butcher — Wed, 21 Apr 2010 19:43:27 +0000

Just a little update…… so I de cluttered my macbook, my home and my mind & felt clear and free. But I found myself starting again!!! Downloading more junk, trawling amazon for more books, printing interesting stuff out etc….. BUT I’ve recognised it and stopped myself….. the true nature of addictions

Comment on Information Overload by Paul

Paul — Thu, 15 Apr 2010 14:37:26 +0000

Hi Stephie, I’m really delighted that you were able to take to content of the show and get some useful tips out of it and put them in to ACTION!

I can really relate to you forgetting what you were looking for, I do that all the time too!

Keep up the great work.

Comment on Information Overload by Stephanie Butcher

Stephanie Butcher — Thu, 15 Apr 2010 14:09:59 +0000

Hi Paul and Gina, thankyou very much for the advice!! I’ve already put a lot of what you mentioned into practice and feel so much better already. It’s as though a weight has been lifted. I sat down with a notebook and using my morning pages (which I’ve now been writing for a few months) I made a list of what was important to me. It was quite a revelation actually as I discovered there were rather a lot of things I’ve been stressing and beating myself up about that weren’t beneficial to me or anyone else!! I’ve cancelled several newsletters, unsubscribed to emails and am limiting my computer time. I’ve got so much more spare time now! You are absolutely right about how addictive it all is, and even when you are searching for information that you need there are so many links, you can spend hours clicking away, forgetting what you were looking for in the first place.

Comment on Morning Pages by Action Podcast » Action Podcast

Action Podcast » Action Podcast — Tue, 30 Mar 2010 23:17:51 +0000

[...] Morning pages – I use either good old fashioned pen and paper, or I have a couple of iPhone apps that I use. They are EverNote and ShapeWriter. [...]

Comment on Coping with Redundancy by Tweets that mention Action Podcast » Action Podcast -- Topsy.com

Tweets that mention Action Podcast » Action Podcast -- Topsy.com — Mon, 29 Mar 2010 07:42:15 +0000

[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Paul G Bailey, Alan Gee. Alan Gee said: Coaching Action Podcast » Action Podcast http://bit.ly/8Z2ngc via RSS [...]

Comment on Procrastination is the thief of time by Gina

Gina — Mon, 15 Mar 2010 14:11:39 +0000

Hi Regina

Many thanks for your wonderful feedback. It’s always great to hear from listeners and even better to hear that actionpodcast is a useful resource for you!
Here’s to moving out of procrastination for all of us.
All the best!

Gina

Comment on Procrastination is the thief of time by Regina

Regina — Sat, 13 Mar 2010 18:51:08 +0000

Gina, great article on the “P” word. I totally could relate. I am the queen of procrastination – been this way most of my life. I recently started to write “to do lists” again. It keeps me much more focused. Letting go of the concept of perfectionism is also very freeing. You have reminded me that the key is in the doing verses the self-judging and fear that keeps me moving forward. Thank you for the helpful and practical strategies. I choose to practice them! Like that —changing my language already. I’m a new but big fan of Action Podcast.com Keep the wisdom flowing. Be well. RR

Comment on Living in Lack by Are You living in Abundance, or living in lack? « The 55 Concepts

Are You living in Abundance, or living in lack? « The 55 Concepts — Sat, 13 Mar 2010 15:47:33 +0000

[...] PDRTJS_settings_1302066_post_71 = { "id" : "1302066", "unique_id" : "wp-post-71", "title" : "Are+You+living+in+Abundance%2C+or+living+in+lack%3F", "item_id" : "_post_71", "permalink" : "http%3A%2F%2F55concepts.wordpress.com%2F2010%2F02%2F14%2Fare-you-living-in-abundance-or-living-in-lack%2F" } Take a listen to this podcast on the topic of abundance! Nancy Baker and Annmarie Serratore from The 55 Concepts, discuss this topic with Sam Forsberg and Paul Bailey from Action Podcast! This was a fun podcast to do as Sam and Paul are fun and charming! http://www.actionpodcast.com/2010/02/living-in-lack-1263/#more-1263 [...]

Comment on Dealing with disagreements by Dealing with disagreements « The 55 Concepts

Dealing with disagreements « The 55 Concepts — Sat, 13 Mar 2010 14:18:33 +0000

[...] This podcast was done by Action Podcast. Paul Baily and Sam Forsberg discuss the topis of dealing with disagreements and weave into their discussion the Concepts! Take a listen! http://www.actionpodcast.com/2009/02/dealing-with-disagreements-498/ [...]

Comment on All talk and no Action? by Paul

Paul — Wed, 10 Feb 2010 09:02:46 +0000

Hi Shola!

Believe me I feel your pain on setting up a website. You find yourself spending days if not weeks painstakingly choosing the right font, and then realise you still don’t have anything to publish.

Breaking it down to it’s core components is key here, as with most big projects. First thing is to stop worrying about it and just start a freebie site, at least you can get to work on it and you ca always transfer the content to a dedicated website later.

There are loads of sites that can do this for you. I personally recommend wordpress.com to start off with. See what you can create in just a few minutes.

Good luck and ENJOY!

Paul

Comment on Morning Pages by Stephanie Butcher

Stephanie Butcher — Tue, 09 Feb 2010 19:57:41 +0000

The men’s version of simple abundance is not the same at all….. we found it incredibly depressing…..

Comment on All talk and no Action? by Shola

Shola — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 03:46:09 +0000

Gina/Paul,

I’m taking you up on your challenge. As someone who’s been trying to put up a website for my jewelry for the past FIVE years, I REALLY needed to hear this. The thought of creating a site was just soo overwhelming to me and as a result I just haven’t done anything. Paul, your insight about how we always think the steps towards the goal needs to be big and difficult REALLY spoke to me.

And Gina, I can completely relate to your comment about how time is just speeding up, clearly, I am no stranger to procrastination.

Thank you soo much for this podcast, I thoroughly enjoyed it and you’ve really motivated me to take action.

Cheers,

Shola

Comment on Where do you want your control? by Paul

Paul — Mon, 01 Feb 2010 14:54:13 +0000

It’s funny isn’t it, that when we suffer a break in like that, our first reaction is to take it personally! What did I do to warrant this attack on my personal property?! Ultimately you did nothing, you were just the unlucky random victim. Remembering that and taking some action to try and avoid it happening again helps you take back control.

Comment on The secret to discovering your ultimate motivation by Chris

Chris — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 20:11:29 +0000

Hi Angela — thanks for your comment. I always find it energising to find ways to switch my to-dos from push to pull. It’s amazing the shift in perspective that little thought can have…and most importantly, an extra boost to take consistent action!

Comment on Where do you want your control? by Stephanie Butcher

Stephanie Butcher — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 11:24:47 +0000

Very true. My car was broken into a few years ago and all I could think of was “how could anyone leave broken glass in the babies car seats”. As if they had even noticed!!

Comment on The secret to discovering your ultimate motivation by Angela

Angela — Thu, 21 Jan 2010 11:04:09 +0000

I love this concept about pull motivation and not waiting for someone else to “poke you into action”. It’s so true that most, if not all of my To-do lists consist of push-motivated things. The part about having a plan and vision (i.e. beautiful family life…that one really got to me) really help to see things in perspective and see the real reason underlying why we want to do things. thanks a bunch.

Comment on Morning Pages by janice

janice — Mon, 14 Dec 2009 20:43:39 +0000

I think you have to move along your line of creativity and accept everything that happens, making something beautiful out of what has come before. There is no time for judgement in a performance sport and letting your creativity soar requires that same kind of unstoppable momentum. Inspiration comes in packages that we don’t always recognize. Those “mistakes” are incredible opportunities to make something completely new, to experience the exhileration of going out on that limb where you must trust beyond what you know, and the strong feeling of confidence that comes with being able to make something out of anything without any need to justify it beyond the obvious- that it is yours and you are both allowed and encouraged as it is the gift we humans have been given. Create. It’s good.

Comment on Morning Pages by Stephanie Butcher

Stephanie Butcher — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 21:00:37 +0000

Thanks for the link, I’ve got it now. I’ve listened to about a quarter of it so far as, like you, I don’t want to rush and not absorb all the information.

Comment on Morning Pages by Paul

Paul — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 11:33:48 +0000

I was able to buy it from iTunes
http://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewAudiobook?id=2798715&s=143444

Comment on Morning Pages by Stephanie Butcher

Stephanie Butcher — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 21:39:21 +0000

Thanks Paul, it’s a good job I trust you all!

How do I find the audio version? I’ve had a search but no luck so far.

Comment on Morning Pages by Paul

Paul — Wed, 25 Nov 2009 19:45:41 +0000

Hi Stephie, I’ve been doing my morning pages for just over 1 week now and I’m really starting to appreciate them. I’ve been talking to a few other people via twitter that also rave about them. I downloaded the audio version and I’m about half way through it at the moment, I wanted to take my time to absorb the information rather than just have it play for a couple of hours without really paying it proper attention.
Don’t worry I won’t tell Andy, your secret is safe with me, the listeners, anyone that views this webpage….. etc so don’t worry

Comment on Morning Pages by Stephanie Butcher

Stephanie Butcher — Wed, 25 Nov 2009 18:13:03 +0000

Hi Paul, Sam and Gina, I have started doing my morning pages again after getting out of the habit, thanks for reminding me! Funnily enough it’s been very easy getting back into it.

It’s funny how both Sam and Gina have mentioned ‘The artist’s way’ and another book I read (Simple Abundance) mentioned it too. I have put it on my wish list for Christmas and am going to buy a copy for my mum too (who is an artist).

I think you would really enjoy reading ‘Simple Abundance’ (it is for women but there is a men’s version too that I have bought for Andy for Christmas ……. don’t tell him)

Comment on Perfect by Paul

Paul — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 22:17:02 +0000

Hi Stephanie! Thanks for your comment, I really do love hearing from you and other listeners about their own experiences on the topics we cover. I’m sure that everyone has that internal conversation (and sometimes external!) I think it’s mostly healthy

Comment on Perfect by Stephanie Butcher

Stephanie Butcher — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 18:43:11 +0000

Yep …. that’s me too!! Oh and Paul I talk to myself constantly so either we’re both sane or completely mad! As well as a perfectionist I’m also so competitive that I ruin “fun” evenings where games are played or there’s a quiz etc.

Comment on Mentors by Paul

Paul — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 08:30:32 +0000

That’s a really good point Matt and not one that we specifically stated, but certainly something that I had assumed; as a mentor would normally have actual experience over a longer period of time than the person being mentored (or as some call it, the Mentee). It’s a very good distinction to make.

Comment on Mentors by Matt Vertrees

Matt Vertrees — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 00:51:28 +0000

Important data point is that typically a mentor is an ‘internal’ resource that understands your goals and aspirations as they relate to the current organization you are involved with. A coach can provide more of a fundamental approach to understanding the critical skill sets that you may require to reach the next level or becoming better in a current role.

Comment on Mentors by Stephen Grindrod

Stephen Grindrod — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 14:59:57 +0000

This is great that you’re discussing mentoring, with the recession and web technology today it’s becoming more known. Since training budgets have been reduced, mentoring is a low-cost alternative for organisations.

Companies have the option to use technology to easily set up mentoring programmes and match well mentors to mentees.

We have seen in the USA a great interest in mentoring, hopefully we will see the same within organisations in the UK.

Comment on The Art of Failure by Sam

Sam — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 20:51:16 +0000

Thanks for sharing Steph.

I’m retyping this as a technical glitch lost my reply…funny the way these things happen!

The brilliant thing about hindsight and past experiences is that we can choose the perspective we hold on them. We have the power to rewrite our stories, changing their meaning and impact for us in the process.

The end of a marriage (~divorce) is acknowledged as one of the most stressful things in life, yet it doesn’t have to be a vicious nightmare. You and I have both demonstrated that it is possible to retain a healthy & caring relationship with an ex. Even in the most difficult experiences, we can’t control how others behave – but we can choose our own reactions.

I know how much you love your kids! How would it be if you saw your first marriage as a success because it blessed you with two wonderful children?
You mentioned that you and Andy have changed your behaviours and priorities as a result of your first marriages. Could it be that those were exactly the experiences you both needed to have created the marriage now that you truly desired?

Whilst my marriage ‘failed’ according to my Christian belief of marriage-for-life, there are a lot of successes in it too if I’m willing to look for them.
Having been a child of an extremely messy divorce, I am deeply grateful to my husband and myself for proving that separation whilst intensely painful can be done with good grace.

I think the saddest thing of all would have been to experience the end of a marriage, and not to have learnt anything about ourselves at all.

You add so much to the ActionPodcast discussions – thanks again for being such an active member of this community!

With love & curiosity,
Sam

Comment on Reality Check by Sam

Sam — Sun, 11 Oct 2009 19:13:03 +0000

Pleasure Steph!
I agree totally, my MP’s (as I lovingly call them) have really opened a door to my creativity, and definitely help clear the space for exciting ideas and insights.
The Artist’s Way book is a great tool for reconnecting with your creativity more deeply, and offers a 12-week process to clear creative blocks & keep you in the zone!
I’ve not yet managed to embrace my Artist’s Date habit – which is the 2nd pivotal tool of Julia Cameron’s work, so there’s even greater room for improvement
Wl&c,
Sam

Comment on Reality Check by Stephanie Butcher

Stephanie Butcher — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 18:25:51 +0000

Hi Sam, thanks for the link, I hadn’t seen your comment until just now. I’ve always written a journal but recently it’s become more of a chore than something I do for pleasure. The morning pages are completely different because you don’t have any preconceived ideas of what you need to write. I’ve found it clears my mind giving it some space for creativeness!!

Comment on The Art of Failure by Stephanie Butcher

Stephanie Butcher — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 17:34:50 +0000

Totally relate to this, my first marriage ended after 10 years too and even though I’ve now been married to Andy for 11 years, that feeling of failure has never gone away. The only good thing about my first marriage was having Charlie and Hollie. I know that Andy and I put our friendship and marriage before anything else in our lives now which I believe is a result of us both experiencing a failed marriage so I suppose that’s something we learnt to make a priority. I have a good relationship with my ex husband and his partner and look after their little boys sometimes so we’ve all moved on in a healthy way but I still sometimes wonder how I could have made such a mistake.

Comment on Reality Check by Sam

Sam — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 10:31:53 +0000

Hi Stephanie and Bernard!

Great to hear from you both! It is fab to be back in action again
Thanks for sharing with us some of the ideas you had after listening to the podcast, how you’ve applied them and other things that have worked to help you keep a reality check on those areas of your lives that needed it more (the family diary & orders of the week sound wonderfully useful as well as a great way to teach about responsible time/event management!).

I’ve amended the post to include details on the Morning Pages activity, and The Artist’s Way – which is where I learnt more about this fabulous tool.

Do let us know how you’ve been getting on with trying out some of these ideas a month or two on!

With love & curiosity,
Sam

Comment on How to Calm a Racing Mind by Where’d that Great Idea go? » Action Podcast

Where’d that Great Idea go? » Action Podcast — Sun, 13 Sep 2009 12:10:03 +0000

[...] a technique mentioned in one of our most popular podcasts How to Calm a Racing Mind, Stream of Consciousness (via writing, mind-mapping, drawing, voice recording or other method) can [...]

Comment on Reality Check by Financial Awareness | Action Podcast

Financial Awareness | Action Podcast — Thu, 27 Aug 2009 19:08:40 +0000

[...] on from their previous podcast, Reality Check, they discuss how even a little bit of measuring can make a world of difference when it comes to [...]

Comment on Reality Check by Bernard McMahon

Bernard McMahon — Fri, 21 Aug 2009 09:50:20 +0000

After a few weeks away I’m catching up with Actionpodcasts. This one seems very apposite since I too have difficulty placing things in the right point in time.
During the holidays I’ve met people not seen for a while and we went through the process of “it must be x months since we last saw you” where x is a highly flexible number depending upon the viewer.
I for one will be adopting the logbook approach by backfilling my calendar with all those things I’ve done, starring the ones I feel pleased with and reviewing those less pleasing.
I’ll have a go with the daily pages routine, though like Paul I might be more likely to record than write.
Finally, I’ve been testing and found it very useful,a web based time sheet system called TicTac Mobile. Take a look at www.tictacmobile.com It’s a Swedish product, the user support is good and the cost is very reasonable – and no I’m not on commission

Comment on Reality Check by Stephanie Butcher

Stephanie Butcher — Tue, 18 Aug 2009 12:55:59 +0000

A few months ago I was getting into such a muddle with my diary despite using the iphone calender because there are so many of us (2 adults and 5 children). The problem was they would say “oh Mum can I have a lift/go to x’s party/meet x in town/join club” etc while I was busy so I wouldn’t remember to put in my diary. SO…… I went to Officeworld and bought one of those enormous office diaries. It is left open at the relevant week on the worktop in the kitchen next to a large pot of colourful pens. The whole family is responsible for adding their own entries (including me). It’s been brilliant because everyone can see what everyone else is doing and whether their activity will be possible. And if they forget to write something in the diary it doesn’t happen!!

For weekly events such as swimming lessons, dance classes, cadets etc I have made an ‘orders of the week’ chart on the computer and stuck it on the kitchen wall. Each person has a different colour to make it easier for the little ones to spot their own column. It’s really helped them to be responsible for getting their equipment ready by the front door the night before.

I love Sam’s idea of writing whatever comes to mind first thing in the morning. I’m going to use the journal app on my iphone to do that.

Lovely to have you back by the way Sam!

Comment on Why wait to treat yourself? by Paul

Paul — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 08:19:12 +0000

That’s a brilliant idea Steph and well done for getting it all booked up! I hope you have another fantastic lunch!

Comment on Why wait to treat yourself? by Steph Butcher

Steph Butcher — Mon, 06 Jul 2009 15:09:58 +0000

I’m going to treat myself by going out for lunch with my friends once a week without feeling guilty. Went last week and had fantastic time and after listening to podcast decided I should do it more often. So we’ve just booked a table to make sure we don’t change our minds!

Comment on Addiction – The First Step by Hopelessly Stuck

Hopelessly Stuck — Mon, 15 Jun 2009 18:36:25 +0000

[...] of all, have a read of this post. Addiction – The First Step | Action Podcast where someone forced herself to face the fact she was an addict of WoW (for several years!) and [...]

Comment on Feeling overwhelmed? by Wednesday Whiteboard#9: The Spiritual Bulimia Edition « AnthroYogini

Wednesday Whiteboard#9: The Spiritual Bulimia Edition « AnthroYogini — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 08:10:35 +0000

[...] another session on Friday at 5.30pm with Sam. In the meantime, check out their podcast on Overwhelm here for some more tips and [...]

Comment on Addiction – The First Step by Pia | Taunaki

Pia | Taunaki — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 06:19:14 +0000

Hi Sam,

I believe it depends on personality if you need to quit an addiction all together or can nipple it so to speak

I know that for my smoking I needed to cut it hard, completely and utterly. It simply took way too much energy for me to argue with myself over and over if it now was time to get that first or 2nd cigarette of the day that I had allowed myself. It took way too much energy and time and struggle to stop myself from telling myself: well, you can get another one, it doesn’t matter anyway.

So I think, if you’re really good at keeping promises for yourself, then you can quit partially and at a level that’s healthy for you. But if you’re not good at keeping promises for yourself, or at least obey yourself without argument, then it’s no go and you should quit completely.

I have friends who can manage the one-two smokes a day without any problems what so ever. If I try that, I just slowly start to smoke more and more as I break one promise to myself after another. I’m not good at keeping them when it’s only myself it relies on.

Also, I’m the type who’ll eat the entire candy-bag once it’s opened in a very short time. I’m not good at saving pleasures for later. Other people are the opposite and I think they can easier manage to quit an addiction partially.

There’s a danger with partial quitting. That you in essence fool yourself. “Sure, I can’t be addicted when I only play one hour a day, can I?” Typical argument. Fact is that yes, you can be addicted even if you only play 5 min a day. It all comes down to why you play and how you do it. My ex, who is an alcoholic, didn’t drink every day, but once in a while. According to himself he weren’t addicted any longer. Bullshit I say, because he still drank for all the same reasons and had all the same behaviours around it. He was merely fooling himself because he wasn’t ready to face reality and take responsibility for his own life and actions.

Addictions are very interesting, the topic is fascinating and there’s so many aspects to it. Just think about it, many of us are addicted to our habits and morning routines. The whole thing of not being able to wake up properly without that shower and that cup of tea in that order

Comment on What is your X? by Journal Work: Three Tools for Instant Problem Solving « AnthroYogini

Journal Work: Three Tools for Instant Problem Solving « AnthroYogini — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 09:24:58 +0000

[...] me to this amazing tool. If you’d like to hear a complete podcast about this tool, click this link. Visit Allison, the self-proclaimed self-help evangelist here at the liveknowingthis link [...]

Comment on Unconsciously incompetent! by Sam

Sam — Thu, 04 Jun 2009 19:53:22 +0000

Hi Amanda,

It is brilliant that you’ve found our podcast helpful, and that it has enabled you to ask for help on this immediate challenge!
You’ve done some great work in getting this far with your PhD, and in working with Paul’s action steps which you’ve shared with us via email – so I’d just like to add a couple of extra observations & questions to Paul’s initial great plan!

- Are you doing this PhD ‘for yourself’ or for someone else? An external source of motivation can be a real drain on energy levels, and make it hard to sustain action. Chris wrote a blog on the different types of motivation which may help you to get a feel for where you’re at with this, and decide if it is worth exploring what the internal-pull type motivation for your PhD would be. http://www.actionpodcast.com/2009/04/the-secret-to-discovering-your-ultimate-motivation-749/#more-749

- What would a really exciting, inspired end to your PhD thesis be? What would it look like? What would these last 2 chapters need to be like to really bring the entire thesis off the page and into energetic substance?

- It sounds like you have both a very supportive workplace, and partner, to help you achieve this and finally free up the energy that has been tied into it for 10 years! The relief this will bring you will be phenomenal! In what ways can you make the most of your workplace’s support during the next 5 weeks in order to complete your thesis? Making the most of all resources & support available to you now will pay off for everyone with the energy you’ll free up once this is done – & remember: there is always a ‘cost’ of not utilising support that is available.

- You may well come across a hurdle, distraction or equally important priority that could override even your best intentions to achieve your writing targets at some point during your plan. You mentioned a couple of options already for working this into your schedule realistically. What contingency can you build into your plan? What other options come to mind?

- The incremental distractions of the internet can really eat into available time. What does using the internet give you? How is it serving you? What *specific* topics would help with your writing of these last 2 chapters? If you have a specific aim for the articles you’re looking for, then it will take a lot less time to find them than via general browsing; & will help you get clear on what is taking you closer to your target of completing the PhD, vs what is taking you away from it. Then your choices become clearer!

- How hard are you being on yourself? The thing that struck me the most, was that you are perhaps beating yourself up with a big (figurative) stick for even the smallest blips (like your website address being wrong!). If you were to adopt a large feather instead of this big stick – just for the next five weeks – how would that be? What would be different?

Paul & I are excited to be helping you through this, both cheering you on with support & providing constructive challenge when necessary. We look forward to hearing how you progress over the next 5 weeks!

With love & curiosity,
Sam

Comment on Addiction – The First Step by Sam

Sam — Thu, 04 Jun 2009 19:35:11 +0000

Hi Stephanie,

Thanks again for joining us here, and especially for adding your comments on this topic!
It certainly does seem like there is scope for much more exploration of Addiction, and I’ll be aiming to tackle another couple of angles on it over the next few weeks. One of the things that occurred to me today, is that whilst there is often a primary need that the addiction is serving (at least initially), there are likely to be secondary needs that also must be addressed or at least considered, when looking to dissolve an addiction & it’s effects.
Also – you touched on the fact that most of us can relate to some level of addiction, and this is important too. Not all addictions are as ‘serious’ as some of the ones I’ve mentioned in my post above. Many of us can relate to needing that initial cup of coffee to ‘get going in the morning’, or of having a favourite ‘comfort’ food that we turn to in times of stress, or even surfing the internet daily (where we seem to lose quantities of time to it, or feel disconnected if we can’t keep up-to-date with our favourite news website or forum etc).

Do let me know if there are other areas of it you’d like to see explored too!

With love & curiosity,
Sam

Comment on Addiction – The First Step by Sam

Sam — Thu, 04 Jun 2009 17:25:44 +0000

Hi Pia!

I really want to start by acknowledging the tremendous changes you’ve made, and your honesty in sharing your story with us too – thank you! It is inspiring to hear from someone who has moved on successfully!

You raise a really important point about addictions – that at some point in our lives, they have SERVED us in some way. For me, my WoW addiction brought a sense of achievement; for you, your online roleplaying brought a sense of social connection (which helped you rebuild your confidence & find the courage for change).
What happens though, is that even once we’ve moved through the point in our lives where our addiction served us (I left the corporate world I found so unfulfilling; you broke free from your violent marriage), the addictive components of it (chemical, habitual etc) still remain. So we are left with an addiction that is now doing us a DISSERVICE.

There is definitely a lot of opportunity for learning, awareness & understanding that this can offer us!

The pointers you shared with us are a great example of how you identified the underlying need that was being met by your addiction, and built some great and positive sources of that into your life instead! By combining your passion and your social networking into your work, you’ve given yourself a wonderfully supportive foundation to continue building on – and one that motivates you to remain on that path.

They say ‘all things in moderation’, and this could well be another aspect of addiction worth exploring. Does recovery need to be ‘all or nothing’ through either a cold-turkey approach or a gradual reduction? Or is moderation in the face of addiction possible? More intriguingly, once we fulfill the underlying need positively, can the allure of the addiction disappear entirely?

I really appreciate you joining us and adding so much to this discussion!

With love & curiosity,
Sam

Comment on A Look In The Mirror by Sam

Sam — Thu, 04 Jun 2009 16:35:36 +0000

Hi Bernard,

Thanks again for your feedback – deeply appreciated!
It is really wonderful to know that our podcasts are reaching people, connecting with them, and helping them – wherever they are in their current journey; and it is such a pleasure to see you expanding your awareness, stretching your bounds, and finding your wings to fly as you work through the topics that resonate with you in timely ways!

Keep on shining bright Bernard!

With love & curiosity,
Sam

Comment on Giving Advice by Sam

Sam — Thu, 04 Jun 2009 10:18:25 +0000

Hi Brigid,

Thanks for your comments, and the link to your own exploration of how it feels to give & receive advice – as well as looking at the sustainability impact of advising vs asking insightful questions!
We can be lucky to have some moments where friends/family/colleagues are able to ask us poignant questions that help us create a perspective shift. We may not recognise those moments or questions as tools that we can draw upon in other challenging situations; and sometimes we might need a series of questions & reflections that really help us open up whatever was holding us back.
Your blog mentions that Coaching is a brilliant opportunity to access our inner wisdom, and that this provides a growing foundation of tools & resources that we (Clients) can use going forwards. I’ve always loved the idea that as a Coach, part of my purpose is to make myself redundant in this way! And of course, there is always the option to come back for more focused Coaching support should a new brick wall show up that you aren’t sure how to start tackling!

With love & curiosity,
Sam

Comment on Giving Advice by Brigid C

Brigid C — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 15:21:09 +0000

Very good podcast Paul and Sam

I wrote a blog post on this subject some time ago that deals with some of these issues: http://coolbeesplace.blogspot.com/2008/11/giving-and-receiving-advice.html

I think it is so important for coaches to be non-directive. With friends and colleagues it is also important to let people talk and figure things out for themselves rather than jumping in and ‘advising’ them!

Comment on Unconsciously incompetent! by Amanda

Amanda — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 10:54:40 +0000

Oops. There’s my website with the correct link. Gee, I’m a doofus tonight!

Comment on Unconsciously incompetent! by Amanda

Amanda — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 10:53:49 +0000

Thanks, Paul. I am going to sit down and try this. I work full time (manager of anthropological research in a small g’ment authority) so I am fitting this in on weekends, spare time at work and home. My workplace is very supportive. However, I really need to lick this final bit and after 10 years (yes, ten years!) I just want it done and off my back.

Thanks so much and I’ll let you know tomorrow night what happened.

Comment on Unconsciously incompetent! by Paul

Paul — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 10:16:37 +0000

Hi Amanda,

Thanks for your comment. Sounds like you have got so far already but just that last little bit is being a really hard nut to crack! Yes a coach would be able to help you through this but I’ll try my best to give you some suggestions as you requested.

Break it down: How many days per week do you want to spend working on your thesis? Be realistic here. Think about how much time per day you can comfortably work without getting too distracted ( see a previous podcast where Gina sharpens her pencils! ).

Once you know how much time you can commit to, divide the chapters in to paragraphs, sentences or a word count so you can determine how much you need to do per session to have completed this in time.

Now you should roughly know how much work you need to do and how often you need to do it. Now again be honest with yourself, does that sound achievable? Do you need to tweak anything to make it more realistic?

Once you have fine tuned your plan, write it down in a short statement and read it aloud a few times. Does it sit comfortably with you? Yes- Great on to the next stage, No- do a bit more tweaking!

Now you have your plan and have accepted and committed to it. Think about what you will do about scheduling your time. What will you need to do to prepare? Who needs to be told about this so they give you the time and space you’ll need to focus? What will be distracting for you and how will you combat it? How will you celebrate your progress each day/week and finally upon completion? This kind of prep work will help you slide naturally into the work without getting caught off guard and failing to do anything.

A good test at this point is to ask yourself, when this is all done and dusted, how will it make me feel? What will it mean to me? What did I find hard about doing this?

Lastly, but strangely firstly…. what do you have to do right now to start the ball rolling? When I say now, I do mean right now, or at least within the next 24 hours. Often people tell me the first thing they need to do is XYZ, but I always ask, OK to do XYZ what do you have to do before that so that you hit XYZ running? Hopefully you’ll think of something so simple, easy and obvious that it will be at this point to find the mists have cleared and you now have a structure laid out in front of you that seems strikingly easy to follow!

Let me know how you get on, either by re-posting here or contact me directly via email paul at actionpodcast dot com.

Good luck!

Comment on Unconsciously incompetent! by Amanda

Amanda — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 09:48:11 +0000

Hi guys,

I can really relate to this and I’m going to ask for some help.

I have 1 1/2 chapters of my PhD thesis left to write, and have to have it done by July 26. But I am so bored, so unmotivated and so convinced that I don’t have anything worthwhile to say, and that I’m dumb (!), I think I need a coach.

Any suggestions?

Comment on Addiction – The First Step by Stephanie Butcher

Stephanie Butcher — Sun, 31 May 2009 20:08:43 +0000

I agree with Pia, Sam’s post was very well written and honest (as you always are Sam). I would love you to cover addictions in a future podcast as I think most of us can relate in one way or another to some level of addiction. As you said there’s a need to escape from real life where we don’t always get that instant gratification for our hard work, suffering, selflessness or whatever it is we feel we are giving to the world.

Comment on A very special guest by Andy Butcher

Andy Butcher — Sat, 30 May 2009 09:29:28 +0000

The point is that it’s the language of “you’re awesome” that’s in question here, it just so happens that’s typical of the American motivational podcasts – I guess it’s just that the vocabulary doesn’t travel very well and that “native” UK speak seems to resonate better.

Comment on A Look In The Mirror by Bernard

Bernard — Fri, 29 May 2009 15:18:34 +0000

As soon as I listened to your discussion about reflection of own character and mood so many things fell into place.
With hindsight it seems obvious. However, like so many things it takes an objective commentator to see and tell what’s going on.
I know when I’ve done something that’s not quite right my guilty feeling will translate to a defensive mode even before I,m in a discussion about it. That in turn leads to an aggressive posture and attitude which is then immediately reflected back at me!
Likewise, when I’m open, positive and bright eyed my colleagues or family reflect that back too.

Great podcast. You really seem to have a gift for nailing things simply and concisely.

Great job

Blessings
Bernard

Comment on Addiction – The First Step by Pia | Taunaki

Pia | Taunaki — Fri, 29 May 2009 14:06:46 +0000

Great post and well written. I can relate having been addicted to an online roleplaying game myself. This one was text based and much more social minded than WoW. One reason I never even tried WoW, it never gave enough impression of social network, real roleplay and all that which I needed for my escapism.

These online networks can be amazingly good at a period in life, but they take a lot as well. I use my gaming to get out of a violent marriage, the success of my character gave me the belief and courage to break free and that I could. Creating friendships online had me visit a bunch of them in the US for 5 weeks, probably the best holiday in my life, I met some very deep friends, which I still have contact with, and one became my coach helping me get control of my life, break my tendency to self-destruction, helped me change behaviours and move forward.

About half a year ago I practically stopped playing, I would log on, wait for my close friends/those fun to RP with to get online, but in general I felt very unfulfilled and dissatisfied. Eventually I just let my subscription run out and haven’t missed it since.

I realized it was the social aspect I was longing for and missing when I took breaks. But leaving and not playing showed me how shallow many of them were. It was a false sense of company to be online with people. I guess I learned it the hard way when people stopped talking to me when I stopped playing. The few true friends I have this way still talk, but the social need wasn’t covered after I stopped.

I built my own RL social circles instead, and the more I go out to networking events, visiting people, working on Taunaki, being in contact due to Taunaki and so on, the less I miss the online world and the friendships there.

I’ve learned a lot from it and while it’s been an escape, it’s also been a good lesson and valuable at the time. It gave me the belief that I could be loved and appreciated, that I have value and all those things.

My advice is:
~ Work with stuff RL that’s your passion. I love my work with Taunaki and it’s very fulfilling. It’s my passion and drive. It makes me happy, makes me feel I accomplish things, it’s a wonderful challenge, huge life lesson and professional lesson as well and so on.
~ Be social. Get out and meet new people. Attend a local networking event where everybody are there to meet new people and create contacts. I do it both for Taunaki and looking for potential partners and investors, but just as much for me to get out and be social.

Combining the two, my passion and networking pretty much gives me the same fulfilment as playing did. My roles are perhaps somewhat the same now as what my characters did in many ways, so that might be why.

I hope this helps. Gaming and escaping can be good, but only in moderation. A short period of life to get a chance to breathe, feel success and then you face the real world again and conquer it.

Good luck, you’ll get there!
Pia

Comment on A very special guest by Paul

Paul — Wed, 27 May 2009 19:53:09 +0000

Awwww that’s SO not how it was meant to come out! I hope I haven’t offended any of my friends from across the pond! I guess it’s just my British reserve seeping out. I promise to even things out with a bit of UK bashing at some point. Actually I think I already did that in several episodes, oh dear now the USA and the UK are going to hate me.

Comment on A very special guest by Auntie Vera Charles

Auntie Vera Charles — Wed, 27 May 2009 17:39:31 +0000

AMERICA BASHERS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love your podcast kisses,
Vera

Comment on Can You Help Me? by Sam

Sam — Tue, 26 May 2009 09:51:33 +0000

Hi Xenia,

Wow! Thanks for your comments about the challenge of asking for help! I particularly love the way you mentioned asking for some diesel, and added some really interesting questions to the mix!
You’ve inspired another thought in me too – another way we can start taking small action steps towards being more comfortable in asking for help.
Start by asking yourself for help.
What one thing, if you asked yourself for help with it, would really shift a gear and get you moving just now?
You also touched on the fact that when we look after ourselves (or allow someone to help us), that we are in a better position to help others! It would be a real challenge to offer to help someone out of the quicksand, if we’re stuck right in there beside them!

With love & curiosity,
Sam

Comment on A Look In The Mirror by Sam

Sam — Tue, 26 May 2009 09:40:42 +0000

Hi Gai,

A fellow Aussie!!
Thank you so much for taking the time to offer this feedback!
I’m really glad that you were touched by my poem, and that you found us through iTunes – welcome!
With ActionPodcast we really strive to deliver timely and relevant topics – so it is great that you feel we are achieving this!
Do let us know if there are any particular topics you’d be interested in hearing us tackle, and I trust you’ll continue to enjoy this journey with us.

With love & curiosity,
Sam

Comment on A Look In The Mirror by Gai

Gai — Tue, 26 May 2009 06:30:09 +0000

Hi from Australia
I happened upon your podcast thru Itunes
I am always looking to live & learn
You guys are very easy to understand and very pertinent
to our current imes
I love your podcast and I was especially very touched by the poem that Sam wrote & shared
Many Many Thanks
Look forward to many more insights
Kind Regards
Gai

Comment on Can You Help Me? by Xenia

Xenia — Wed, 20 May 2009 14:31:39 +0000

Really enjoyed listening to the conversation between Gina and Sam. I too find it difficult to ask for a “motorbike” at times but I agree that if the asking is seen as sharing it can take the edge off and actually feel Ok to ask for some diesel now and again… Maybe to enable our daring to ask ‘another’ we can ask ourselves… Would we not help someone if we could? Is there anyone on this earth who has never needed help at some point? The chances are that if we have been helped along our journey we will be better placed to help in return and what better way to connect to the people around us then by sharing our humanness.

Comment on Celebrating the 5000th download of our motivational podcasts by Twitted by CuriosityCoach

Twitted by CuriosityCoach — Thu, 14 May 2009 11:09:45 +0000

[...] This post was Twitted by CuriosityCoach – Real-url.org [...]

Comment on Love yourself by Paul

Paul — Mon, 11 May 2009 05:34:04 +0000

Hi Karen, thanks for taking the time to post a comment. I’m delighted that you are enjoying the podcasts. This one was certainly an eye opener for not only our listeners but also for Gina and I! Keep in touch and let us know how you get on.

Comment on Love yourself by karen

karen — Mon, 11 May 2009 04:35:23 +0000

Hi! Just found your podcast on iTunes this past weekend, and it’s a joy to listen in. Your coaching really fills a gap that I had, because I defeated my eating disorder, but hadn’t been able to effectively turn my habits around into positive action.
This podcast about loving yourself in particular identifies easy, practical ways to love yourself that are both cheap and renewing. Thanks so much!

Comment on Dealing with negative people by Auntie Vera Charles

Auntie Vera Charles — Thu, 23 Apr 2009 15:18:57 +0000

Quite frankly, with your beautiful accents AND lovely voices, I could listen to you just read the phonebook, but this podcast was wonderful in its content as well. Thank you Paul for letting me know about it. I really, really enjoyed it. You two work so well together and make a very enjoyable, beautifully produced and informative show.

Thank you kisses,
Vera

Comment on The secret to discovering your ultimate motivation by Chris

Chris — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 22:11:20 +0000

Hi Josie and Lynn — thanks for your comments and so glad you found the information valuable. Josie — loved your youtube video and Lynn — let us know if you need any specific guidance on how to apply this to your church and students!

Comment on The secret to discovering your ultimate motivation by Lynn J. Shepard

Lynn J. Shepard — Wed, 22 Apr 2009 00:13:38 +0000

I got really excited while reading this because I kept thinking of more and more ways to apply it to my life, the life of the two churches I serve as pastor, and the students I tutor. Thank you for sharing this.

Comment on Celebrating the 5000th download of our motivational podcasts by Stephanie Butcher

Stephanie Butcher — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 19:16:48 +0000

Congratulations to you all on 5000 downloads. Always look forward to listening to your podcasts which are delivered with honesty, warmth and humour!

Comment on Celebrating the 5000th download of our motivational podcasts by sharon

sharon — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 10:07:12 +0000

hi thanks for a wonderful podcast and congratulations for getting to 500th download. i wish you the best and look forward to listening to more great downloads . lets get to next goal stone ….i wish you the best

sharon

Comment on The secret to discovering your ultimate motivation by Josie

Josie — Sat, 18 Apr 2009 20:04:55 +0000

This is SENSATIONAL information!!! I have been searching for information on pull motivation and this brief succing post was packed with just what I was looking for!

So tremendously helpful and inspiring!!

Cheers!

Comment on Celebrating the 5000th download of our motivational podcasts by Bernard McMahon

Bernard McMahon — Fri, 17 Apr 2009 19:35:04 +0000

Congratulations on 5000 downloads. I’m sure everyone enjoys them as much as I do.
Great job.

Comment on Age of Irrelevance! by Ian aka 'Manty'

Ian aka 'Manty' — Mon, 06 Apr 2009 09:32:46 +0000

Firstly .. gratz on the birthday.
I read your post with interest and a lot of what you said resonated with views of my own. Interestingly, there is an observation I would like to add regarding growing older.

As I age there is something you grow more aware of and you might say you start to fear. It’s not what you might think it is, it’s not death. As we grow older there is an area of our life that continues to grow with us, our family and friends. As I grow older I don’t fear death, my fear relates to those I will leave behind. For me it’s over … for them a new chapter of their lives will begin without me.. for me my fear is I will no longer be there for them.

Sorry for maybe taking your post in the wrong direction, but reading the above made me want to write down my thoughts.
Oops…forgot to say great post! Looking forward to your next one.

Comment on Breaking the ice by Paul

Paul — Mon, 30 Mar 2009 07:59:44 +0000

Thanks Bernard, glad you liked the podcast. I love finding new and interesting ways to interact with people just to see if I can! I’d love to hear any stories from people about conversations they struck up with random people and how that affected their day.

Comment on Breaking the ice by Bernard McMahon

Bernard McMahon — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 11:04:07 +0000

I listened to Breaking the ice this morning. It was very timely. I’ve been a Twitter fan now sin I joined only a couple of months ago and I’ve been fascinated by the way the friendships develop.
I’m a pretty confident and gregarious person but we all often find it hard to make new connections with people.
Social media does seem to give people a new opportunity to connect and relate to new people.
The podcast presents really exciting tactics (or even strategies) that will help you to make first contact with new people in a low risk / no hidden agenda way.
Like Twitter, some contacts will be fleeting while others will lead to long firm friendships.
I’d urge everyone to be confident in making those first connections and if you follow Gina and Paul’s ideas you’ll have fun.

Comment on Feeling overwhelmed? by Paul

Paul — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 08:40:04 +0000

Hi Bernard feeling overwhelmed can be so debilitating if you aren’t able to take a step back and start break things down into smaller chunks. This is where friends, family or your coach can make the most impact on your life. With their support your really can achieve anything you put your mind to. I’m really love to hear back from your with regards to this topic being timely and find out what results you were able to achieve after listening to the show. Feel free to contact me directly via email to paul AT actionpodcast DOT com

Comment on Are You Stuck In Your Stories? by Paul

Paul — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 08:34:36 +0000

Hi Bernard, Thank you so much for taking the time to comment on our podcast. It’s sometimes a bit like shouting into the wind never ready knowing if your message it getting out there! I’m so glad you find these podcasts useful and are able to relate to them on a personal level. This podcast in particular was quite a struggle as you can see from Sam’s previous comment so it makes it even more special that you were able to gain something from it.

Comment on Are You Stuck In Your Stories? by Bernard McMahon

Bernard McMahon — Wed, 25 Mar 2009 19:51:46 +0000

I’m committed to the idea that it’s what we think we are rather what we THINK we ARE. If that makes sense.
In the podcast you drive hom ethis concept. It is so easy to repeat stories about ourselves that over time become much bigger than the event that triggered them.
I work hard to “write” new stories for myself to move forward.
As with all your podcasts, your conversational and accessible approach is easy to listen to and moreover easy to translate into personal situations.
Great job.

Comment on Feeling overwhelmed? by Bernard McMahon

Bernard McMahon — Wed, 25 Mar 2009 19:43:47 +0000

Feeling Overwhelmed was an excellent piece. It really reminded my that it’s so easy to try to deal with big situations on one’s own.
Breaking down the situation/project into bite sized chunks and bouncing ideas of another trusted colleague friend or coach makes all the difference.
I felt your discussion of the topic was both sharp and timely (for me)
Cheers

Comment on What is your X? by What is your X? | Action Podcast | Life Coaching - Paul G Bailey

What is your X? | Action Podcast | Life Coaching - Paul G Bailey — Sun, 22 Mar 2009 21:55:05 +0000

[...] What is your X? | Action Podcast. [...]

Comment on Create your road map for life by Create your road map for life | Action Podcast | Life Coaching - Paul G Bailey

Thu, 05 Mar 2009 06:41:47 +0000

[...] Create your road map for life | Action Podcast. [...]

Comment on Where are you right now? by Paul

Paul — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 08:44:25 +0000

As a side note, sorry for the late posting of this podcast. I’ve had a few disk space issues! I’ve managed to tidy things up a bit and have another couple of podcast that will be uploaded soon!

Comment on Where are you right now? by Where are you right now? | Action Podcast | Life Coaching - Paul G Bailey

Mon, 02 Mar 2009 08:42:16 +0000

[...] Where are you right now? | Action Podcast. [...]

Comment on Dealing with disagreements by Dealing with disagreements | Action Podcast | Life Coaching - Paul G Bailey

Tue, 03 Feb 2009 14:09:32 +0000

[...] Dealing with disagreements | Action Podcast. [...]

Comment on Dealing with disagreements by Sam

Sam — Mon, 02 Feb 2009 14:32:47 +0000

The Conscious Concepts mentioned in this discussion are from the book ‘The 55 Concepts: A Guide to Conscious Living’ by Michael Cavallaro.
You might also be interested in checking out these sites:
http://www.55concepts.com/ (where you can learn more & even listen to an intro teleclass) and http://nancybaker.com/ (Nancy first introduced me to these awesome yet simple concepts!)

Comment on Are You Stuck In Your Stories? by Sam Forsberg

Sam Forsberg — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 17:08:56 +0000

This was not the first recording of the podcast on ‘Rewriting Our Stories’ that Paul & I have done. It wasn’t even quite the second…
In fact, for a little while there – I didn’t think Paul & I were going to be able to publish a podcast on this topic at all.

We don’t doctor our recordings (although we do tidy them up when connection issues cause a blip or when catching some other ad-hoc curve ball – Paul is our tech-wiz!); so what you hear is pretty much what you get with us. And we don’t pretend to be perfect or have all the answers. Sometimes we’re just a single step ahead of those we are helping. Which means we are always learning: learning more about ourselves, about the topics we share, about each other and about life – usually laughing deeply along the way (especially as potential for learning is greatly increased when you can learn to laugh at yourself & your experiences!)

So I wanted to share with you another example of just how powerful our stories can be.

I sustained my back-injury over 11 years ago. I was first shown that I could rewrite my story ~8 years ago; and since then, have learned to manage my back injury rather than letting it control me and the quality of life I lead.

Yet when Paul & I began exploring this topic, and I tried sharing my story by starting with the triggering event (rather than with my chosen story), I was stunned by just how depressing and heavy it was. By simply talking about the accident and what I felt I’d lost during those first 3 years, not only reminded me of the unpleasant details but almost took me back to that place of feeling helpless and crippled.

The tone of that first podcast was totally wrong! Our second attempt, with a few ideas to tweak it, didn’t work any better. It certainly wasn’t going to be inspiring and empowering when it left us both feeling down in the mouth. Yet we weren’t quite prepared to walk away from the topic – which we felt would be a really powerful tool in helping each of you to rewrite those experiences that haven’t served you well.

And then we realised – the places to start our stories with were the stories we’ve CHOSEN, rather than the ones thrust upon us initially, that we’d accepted by default. All of a sudden, the podcast was living and breathing the results of stories we’d re-written!!

I’ve not bought into my old ‘victim’ story for many years now – yet it shows that just by giving such an old story the space to be dug up (even with good intention) – it can have a powerful effect on how we feel about ourselves and our world. How powerful does that make the stories we repeat to ourselves every single day?!

Thanks for giving me the opportunity to rebury that old limiting tale, and recommit to my choice of the story that has been, and will continue to be, my bridge to a shining present AND future.

We’d love to hear the stories you’ve re-written if you’d like to share!

Comment on Things you know you should be doing.. but aren’t! by Cam

Cam — Sat, 10 Jan 2009 13:17:17 +0000

Just a quick not to say how much I have been enjoying the podcasts here – they have helped me and provided a few giggles too.

Keep up the good work.

Regarding things I should be doing that I’m not: early nights! I feel so much better the following day after a good sleep yet I continue to go to bed at a silly hour.

As for WoW parental control, I may use it one day but I’ll need to remove all the blocks I have put in preventing me from accessing that web page!

Comment on Will the Myth of Selfishness Ruin Your 2009? by David N

David N — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 12:53:33 +0000

Hi Sam, this is a great article and something everyone should read. I believe what you are saying, and it is true you will only find true happiness in all aspects of life if you are totally happy with yourself and the choices you make. Thanks.

Comment on Putting the “Happy” back in to your New Year! by Jennie Bayliss

Jennie Bayliss — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 18:23:29 +0000

Sam and ‘the team’

I love what you have created here! This is an easy, informal way for people to learn some of the coaching tools that are so useful. Well done!!

Ahh, yes, Tolerations… this is a great time of year to ‘zap’ some of them. As Sam said, the amount of energy it takes to ‘put things right’ is often less than the effort it takes to keep putting up with them. So my wish for all of you is to zap at least one thing that is bugging you. It doesn’t have to be hard, nor expensive. Mine is to sort out my wardrobe. Out with those things that have been hanging unworn for a year! And down to charity shop they will go. What will you zap?

with love

Jennie

Comment on Putting the “Happy” back in to your New Year! by Sam Forsberg

Sam Forsberg — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 14:36:29 +0000

…Sam’s Secret Confession…
Whilst I didn’t stick my (figurative) hand up in our podcast, I too, confess myself to be a veteran WoW gamer!

Due to the highly addictive nature of World of Warcraft – I don’t recommend it to anyone – but I do love it!

/dance

Comment on Transition times by Sam Forsberg

Sam Forsberg — Fri, 12 Dec 2008 14:00:43 +0000

Humans tend towards the habitual…
Whether it is ordering the same meal at your favourite restaurant, putting your shoes & socks on the same way/in the same order, or the route you take to get somewhere – our lives are often riddled with automatic responses that we aren’t even aware of!

To start inviting change into your life in smaller steps, notice what habitual patterns you can find in your daily life, and just decide to do one thing differently each day!

It may well feel uncomfortable to begin with, so the more you do it the more natural it will feel – and you may even surprise yourself with what you learn!