Learned helplessness. It’s not a common phrase but it’s a very common strategy we employ when we feel we’ve lost control of life, and we feel that the only way to get that control back is to act helpless. The roots of learned helplessness often occur in childhood and developed as a coping strategy to deal with emotional, psychological or physical abuse. Were you brought up by hyper critical parents? Do you find you often start things but give up quickly? Are you afraid of intimacy and making deeper connections? Do you always feel the need to be in control, albeit by acting either out of control or helpless?
Paul and Gina discuss ways in which you can recognise if you are suffering from learned helplessness and how you can take steps to move out of this self-sabotaging patterning to a place where you can feel more confident, and eventually stop playing the ‘small and helpless’ game.
Creating rapport
Other people are our greatest resource. Most everything you’ll ever want in life, you’ll need someone else to help you get it. From dry-cleaning to a promotion. From the fine art of sexual conjoinment, to that convertible you’ve been coveting. It takes (more than) two to tango. You can’t do it all alone. The benefits of creating and maintaining rapport with other human beings are enormous, so unless you’re a natural, it’s an essential skill worth learning.
So what is rapport?
A dictionary definition describes it as relation; connection, esp. harmonious or sympathetic relation. It’s all about communicating effectively in your life, to strengthen your connection with people and ensure you are understood. And it has its roots in the French verb, rapporter, to bring back. It’s a give and take scenario here. Successful communication is equally important between family, friends, lovers, and work colleagues. Personal development expert, Tony Robbins asks: “Is it more important to be right, or more important to be in love with someone?” Good question!
Have you ever heard the expression ‘focus creates reality’?
It’s a powerful phrase that describes the fact that what we think about we certainly do attract. So if your focus is on lack of money, lack of love, lack of relationships then that is exactly what you’ll attract – more of the same.
Chris and Gina discuss effective ways in which we can shift the power in our subconscious minds. And as a result, create a more powerful, fulfilling current reality in which we are consciously focusing on all the things we do want to create in our lives.
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